Post by Jed BHello All,
I'm searching for my birth parents particularly my birth mother as I
was adopted shortly after my birth. I was born in October 1965 and
was adopted in April 1966. I currently have in my possession copies
of my original birth certificate, my birth mothers birth certificate
and my adoption certificate.
I was born in Sheffield and my birth mother was born in Putney in
1942. My birth father and his occupation have been omitted on my
original birth certificate thus making it impossible to find out who
he is/was without firstly contacting my birth mother.
And you may not have contact because she does not want it. Or even if
she does allow contact she may not be able to tell you who your father
was. And even if she could tell you who your father was she may choose
not to do so for reasons which appear good to her. And even if she
tells you it does not follow that you can contact him.
Post by Jed BI wish to register myself with either a government or non
governmental adoption contact register that specialises in tracing
birth parents.
Can I ask for recommendations please.
NORCAP. Get their bumf, read it, and do what it says. That
recommendation is unbiased. I am not a member or supporter of NORCAP
and never will be. My speciality is in post-adoption problems which
arise when the system has broken down and lives are at stake. The
first move must always be to try the system. If it works, and it does
for almost all cases where it can work, the problem is solved and what
I do would be an unnecessary nuisance. Furthermore I take up cases or
don't take them up at my sole discretion, and for any case I take up
there are no charges for my time or expenses. I take up very few cases
and they are almost always to do with some little hitler who has made
a mistake out of ignorance and who then abuses power to cover up that
mistake regardless of any damage done to individual people. In other
words the cases are not about adoption and searching as such. They are
about injustice. They take a lot of time and expense, and that is only
going to be incurred for people who have made the fullest honest
attempt to use the system provided. If NORCAP turn you down for good
reason there is no point coming to me. It is a recognised body and
complies with the law.
That some of the law is exceedingly stupid is another issue. That is
about politics and long-term changes. For individuals in the here and
now you comply with the law 'as is' and deal only with bodies which
also comply with it 'as is'.
There is an alternative approach. You can go to a commercial firm,
which may or may not play ducks and drakes with the law. If you do,
kindly don't come back to the newsgroup with tales of how you have
been ripped off and how it all went wrong, should such things happen.
I for one will have no sympathy with you because all my attention will
be reserved for those people you and your hired guns have damaged.
Adoption searching does NOT involve just two people. At the beginning
you don't know how many people it involves or how delicate their
existing situations may be. You cannot know how much time it will take
to sort out those relationships or what the costs involved would be if
it is to be done in a proper and considerate manner. Those are NOT
considerations which necessarily enter into the calculation of profit
margins in a business. If you give a commercial organisation a forced
choice of making a loss by handling your case properly, or making a
profit by cutting corners regardless of damage to others, how would
you expect it to choose? How would you choose if it was your sole
source of income? There are some things which should not be run as a
business. In my opinion, adoption searching is one of them.
Don