How do I...

[Chris]

Hi,

I'm a newcomer to newsgroups, so please excuse me if I do something
wrong, but...


I was born in Cheltenham in 1946 and given up for adoption immediately.
My foster parents were great but I always wondered after I was told of
my circumstances.

A few years ago, I managed to find my birth mother (almost a fluke: she
emigrated to Oz but came back and settled in Tunbridge Wells. On the
day I went looking for more info she happened to be in Cheltenham
visiting friends and, well, one thing led to another and within a couple
of hours I was talking to her!).

However, she would never say who my father was and sadly, she died 6
months after I found her.

So, I have no idea who he is/was except that she said he was a
travelling salesman. Does anyone have any suggestions how I can best
seek him out or bring my existence to his awareness?

Thanks

[Robin]

Post by Chris
Hi,
I'm a newcomer to newsgroups, so please excuse me if I do something
wrong, but...
I was born in Cheltenham in 1946 and given up for adoption immediately.
My foster parents were great but I always wondered after I was told of
my circumstances.

Hi Chris

You say you were adopted but write of your foster parents, were you formally
adopted through the courts or were you long-term fostered? That would affect
what records might have been kept and your entitlement to see them.

Post by Chris
A few years ago, I managed to find my birth mother (almost a fluke: she
emigrated to Oz but came back and settled in Tunbridge Wells. On the
day I went looking for more info she happened to be in Cheltenham
visiting friends and, well, one thing led to another and within a couple
of hours I was talking to her!).
However, she would never say who my father was and sadly, she died 6
months after I found her.
So, I have no idea who he is/was except that she said he was a
travelling salesman. Does anyone have any suggestions how I can best
seek him out or bring my existence to his awareness?
Thanks

If you were formally adopted, was an adoption agency involved or was it a
private adoption? Which court issued the Adoption Order? It will say on your
full adoption certificate which court if you were formally adopted.

You can apply to the adoption agency and the court for access to any file
records that have survived and you should also try the local authority in the
area where you were adopted, there could be a mention of your father there. But
unfortunately many old adoption files have been lost or destroyed particularly
those from before the time of the Children Act 1948 so there might not be that
much hope there. If no records can be found then asking people who knew your
mother at the time is about the only remaining hope.

If you wait until 30 December 2005 you can ask an Adoption Support Agency to do
the work for you but will charged for the service depending on how much work is
involved. Some agencies are already offering such a service and may not charge
prior to 30/12/05

Robin

http://harritt.net

[Chris]

Post by Robin
You say you were adopted but write of your foster parents, were you
formally adopted through the courts or were you long-term fostered?
That would affect what records might have been kept and your
entitlement to see them.

I was formally adopted through the court (Cheltenham); I have my
adoption certificate too. I have just written to the Registrar of
Births and requested a copy of the original entry (the number/date is on
the adoption cert.). Whether an adoption agency was used - I'm not sure.
I was told I was born in Sunnyside Nursing Home, Cheltenham (no longer
exists), but more than that I do not know.

Post by Robin
You can apply to the adoption agency and the court for access to any
file records that have survived and you should also try the local
authority in the area where you were adopted, there could be a mention
of your father there. But unfortunately many old adoption files have
been lost or destroyed particularly those from before the time of the
Children Act 1948 so there might not be that much hope there. If no
records can be found then asking people who knew your mother at the
time is about the only remaining hope.

I will get in touch with the local authority and see what they can
offer. But of people who knew my mother, well, the only way is to go
knocking on doors in the street where she lived, I guess.

Post by Robin
If you wait until 30 December 2005 you can ask an Adoption Support
Agency to do the work for you but will charged for the service
depending on how much work is involved. Some agencies are already
offering such a service and may not charge prior to 30/12/05

Can you say which agencies these might be?

Thanks to you and others who e-mailed - it is a beginning!
---
Chris

[Robin]

Post by Chris

Post by Robin
You say you were adopted but write of your foster parents, were you
formally adopted through the courts or were you long-term fostered?
That would affect what records might have been kept and your
entitlement to see them.

I was formally adopted through the court (Cheltenham); I have my
adoption certificate too. I have just written to the Registrar of
Births and requested a copy of the original entry (the number/date is on
the adoption cert.)

Obviously your date of birth is on the adoption certificate but the number of
your birth registration or any of the other details like your original name
(unless it stayed the same) won't be, perhaps what you have is your Adoption
Order rather than your Adoption Certificate which only has your post adoption
details on it.

Post by Chris
Whether an adoption agency was used - I'm not sure.
I was told I was born in Sunnyside Nursing Home, Cheltenham (no longer
exists), but more than that I do not know.

It does not appear in any of the lists of old nursing homes and shelters from
that era either, are you certain of the name? When you get a copy of your
original birth certificate that will give an address of birth which may throw
more light on the situation M&B homes sometimes used to use particular adoption
societies.

Post by Chris

Post by Robin
You can apply to the adoption agency and the court for access to any
file records that have survived and you should also try the local
authority in the area where you were adopted, there could be a mention
of your father there. But unfortunately many old adoption files have
been lost or destroyed particularly those from before the time of the
Children Act 1948 so there might not be that much hope there. If no
records can be found then asking people who knew your mother at the
time is about the only remaining hope.

I will get in touch with the local authority and see what they can
offer. But of people who knew my mother, well, the only way is to go
knocking on doors in the street where she lived, I guess.

Umm...I'd keep that as a very very last resort if no records turn up from the
LA the adoption society or the court. Have you tried the court for access to
court records under rule 54(3)Adoption (County Court) Rules 1984? might be
different rules if it was a juvenile or magistrates court adoption. Chances
aren't so good as it was so long ago but still worth a try I'd say.

Post by Chris

Post by Robin
If you wait until 30 December 2005 you can ask an Adoption Support
Agency to do the work for you but will charged for the service
depending on how much work is involved. Some agencies are already
offering such a service and may not charge prior to 30/12/05

Can you say which agencies these might be?

Norcap ( http://norcap.org ) After Adoption, SWAN, etc.


Whatever, don't give up.

Robin

http://harritt.net

[Chris Fox]

Post by Robin
Obviously your date of birth is on the adoption certificate but the
number of your birth registration or any of the other details like your
original name (unless it stayed the same) won't be, perhaps what you
have is your Adoption Order rather than your Adoption Certificate which
only has your post adoption details on it.

Oops! You're right on there - Adoption Order it is.

Post by Robin
It does not appear in any of the lists of old nursing homes and
shelters from that era either, are you certain of the name? When you
get a copy of your original birth certificate that will give an address
of birth which may throw more light on the situation M&B homes
sometimes used to use particular adoption societies.

I had one hit on Google - the second child of Walter Patrick Copinger
was born there on 31 March 1943. I await the copy of my birth cert.
with interest.

Post by Robin

Post by Chris
I will get in touch with the local authority and see what they can
offer. But of people who knew my mother, well, the only way is to go
knocking on doors in the street where she lived, I guess.

Umm...I'd keep that as a very very last resort

Knocking on the door of where my mother lived at the time of my birth
was how I found her:

Her house: "Sorry, never heard of her. Try next door who have lived
there all their lives."

Next door: "She emigrated to Australia in the '50s - on a £10 passage.
Never heard of her again, but her best friend still works in the local
Spar shop."

Spar shop: "How strange you should come looking for her today - she now
lives in Tunbridge Wells, but is in Cheltenham for a couple of days,
visiting her brother."

A phone call to her brother, "Hi uncle... !" led to me meeting her later
that afternoon.

I have always felt there was more than just pure luck happening that
day.

Post by Robin
if no records turn up from the LA the adoption society or the court.
Have you tried the court for access to court records under rule
54(3)Adoption (County Court) Rules 1984? might be different rules if it
was a juvenile or magistrates court adoption. Chances aren't so good as
it was so long ago but still worth a try I'd say.

It was in the County of Gloucester Petty Sessional Division of
Cheltenham, before the Juvenile Court (sitting at Cheltenham) on 21
January 1947. I will see what court records exist.

Post by Robin
Whatever, don't give up.

I won't!

Thanks for your help, Robin.